TMI
by Moonlit-Ramblings
Summary: While Emma searches for one of Regina's spellbooks, Snow and Ruby discover something very interesting about Regina's bedroom. Established Swan Queen.


T.M.I.

Summary: While Emma searches for one of Regina's spellbooks, Snow and Ruby discover something very interesting about Regina's bedroom. Established Swan Queen.

A/N: What is there to do during the week when you have 4 exams in two days? Why edit random one-shots, of course! Now that the craziness is over I had time to type up my edits and so here we are. Enjoy!

-/-

"…should be in the closet. The thing is," Emma continued as she led Ruby and Snow through the doorway to Regina's bedroom. "I can't remember the title—none of the stupid titles are ever in English." She opened the door to the ridiculously large walk-in closet, walked to the back, and knelt down, finding the stack of more complex spellbooks, spellbooks which were magical enough to almost have a mind of their own and deemed too dangerous to be in the study where Henry could stumble upon them. "It'll just take a couple minutes for me to flip through so I can find the right one."

"Alright, it's just strange being here," Snow said, looking around uncomfortably. She was still trying to wrap her mind around the fact that her daughter and Regina were dating, being in a bedroom they'd both been in was just a little too much. However, they'd all agreed that while they were dealing with this new threat, they should stay in groups. Emma, Snow, and Ruby had left Granny's together (who was watching Neal), were stopping by the mansion to get the spellbook Regina needed before meeting Regina, Tink, and Elsa at the mausoleum where they were setting up the spell to banish the latest person to threaten their happiness and permanently stop portals from other worlds from opening in their town.

Ruby looked around with great interest because she agreed with Snow, Regina's bedroom was forbidden territory—except to Emma, of course. They're not _living together_, living together, but they're basically living together. Everyone could see it. Being in the room itself certainly wasn't changing her mind. The closet clearly had a number of Emma's clothes in it and there were two hampers. If she thought up an excuse to go into the master bath she was sure she'd find two toothbrushes too. So married.

Ruby moved over to look at the framed pictures on top of Regina's wardrobe. They were all cute and unsurprisingly only featured three people.

"Are you sure we can't help?" Snow asked, peering into the closet at rows of fancy clothes. She wasn't sure she actually wanted to, but doing something had to be less award than just standing here.

"Yeah," Emma said, "You gotta know magic to get any of this." That was true, but that wasn't the only she didn't want Snow over here. She was pretty sure she kept her voice normal so they couldn't tell, but she really needed to talk to Regina about how close the magic books were kept to the box of 'special' toys. It wasn't obvious, but it was enough to make Emma sweat a little at the thought.

"Snow!" David's voice came from down the hall. "Snow!" David had been with Henry, who was picking up other things from around the house, like seemingly random kitchen ingredients, that Regina required.

"David! What is it?!" Snow called back.

There wasn't an answer, only the sound of footsteps getting closer. They stopped and a hesitant knock came on the door.

"Come in!"

"Snow?"

Snow sighed, rolling her eyes, and opened the door. "David, you don't need to knock."

"I know, but you weren't answering so I…" David trailed off.

Snow's brow furrowed, "But I—oh, never mind. What was it you needed to tell me?"

"Oh! Right. I just wanted to say that Henry and I found everything we needed and he's double-checking everything with Regina over the walkie-talkie," David reported. Magic and cell-signals apparently did not mix well and so they'd been forced to use Sherriff department issued walkie-talkies that seemed to be original 1980s curse issue. "We're going to wait in the kitchen, so come down whenever you're done."

"Alright. Sounds good. Emma's just having trouble finding the book so we'll probably take another few minutes before we meet you down there."

"Okay," David nodded before giving an awkward little wave and heading back down the hall.

Snow frowned as she turned back to the room. "Why do you think David couldn't hear me when I answered him?" she asked Ruby.

Ruby shrugged, as she continued trying to memorize everything about the room and see if there was anything she could tease Emma about that, "I guess he couldn't hear you through the door."

"But I could hear him just fine so he should have been able to hear me," Snow pointed out.

Ruby frowned, that was a good point. Now that she had werewolf hearing back, and she lived with Granny who had it too, she'd sort of, lost track of how far off most people could hear. Snow was right though, David definitely should have heard the last thing Snow had said.

She turned to Emma to see if she had any idea—it was basically her house too. "Emma?"

Emma jumped a little, knocking into some coats. She refused to turn around as she answered, "Oh, err, sorry. Forgot to mention that the room is spelled."

"Spelled?" Snow asked as a suspicion began to grow in the back of Ruby's mind.

"Yeah," Emma huffed, "you know, has magic on it?"

"Don't get smart with, young lady," Snow said before asking more seriously, "What kind of spell?"

"A, um," Emma coughed with discomfort. "soundproofing spell."

Ruby felt a knowing grin grow on her face. Snow was still baffled, "But I could hear David fine."

"Yeah, it's one-way, okay?" Emma sighed and stood up, realizing Snow was not going to get this until it was spelled out for her, no pun intended. "If you're in the room and the door is shut, you can hear outside the room, but no one outside can hear anything from inside."

"Why?" Snow sounded completely bewildered, did Regina like to play loud music late at night? Ruby felt like tipping her hat at the ingeniousness that was a one-way soundproofing spell.

Emma gave her mother a look, "God, really? You're going to make me say it?"

Snow gave her a prompting look while Ruby cringed in empathy for her blonde friend, trying not to delight in the mortification she knew was coming.

Emma sighed, "It's so that Henry won't wake up at night when we go to bed because of… because of us, alright?"

It still took Snow another few seconds before her face turned bright red, "Emma!"

Emma herself was rather pink now, "You asked! I'm gonna get back to looking for the stupid book, unless there are any more questions? No? Good." She turned around, ducking back into the closet before either of the brunettes had a chance to say anything.

Snow was now looking anywhere but the bed, her face still flushed while Ruby tried to contain her grin at the best gossip ever. She so called it—no way those two with their eye sex and loud arguments could ever keep it quiet.

"I… I…" Snow tried to think of how to react and failed. "I'm going to go wait downstairs with David and Henry." She left the room fast, swing the door shut behind her, but not before Ruby caught the faint murmur of "porn".

She laughed quietly, before turning to the other woman. She leaned against the closet door, "So, I guess congratulations are in order. Or should I be congratulating Regina?" she waggled her eyes brows with a salacious smirk.

"Oh, shut up," Emma sounded a lot less flustered now that her mother was no longer asking about her sex life. "You're just jealous you don't have a similar spell—especially with the 'big ears' Granny has."

Ruby rolled her eyes, "Harsh, and yet true." She waited a few seconds, but Emma didn't say anything else. She shifted her weight from foot to foot, "Sooo? Come on, you gotta give me something. Please?"

Emma sighed, but, well, she really did wanna tell someone about this part of her relationship with Regina and who better than Ruby. "If you must know, it's really, er, both of us. At first it was just precautionary, cuz Henry's down the hall, but it was actually really necessary.

. "Congratulations to you both then."

"Thanks," Emma said gruffly, though secretly flattered.

"I just don't why you keep the spell up all the time," Ruby mussed aloud. "Doesn't that use up a lot of energy or something?

"Actually," Emma said, frowning at the page in one book, "It's easier to just leave it up than to have to take it down and put it up every—" She suddenly realized what she was saying, "I mean…"

"Damn." Ruby gave a low whistle of admiration. "You two are totally going at it like rabbits, aren't you?"

"Shut up," Emma tried to sound annoyed, but Ruby could detect the pride too. "And it's not just noise and making sure the neighbors don't think one of us is killing the other."

"Oh?" Ruby asked, curious.

"Yeah, sometimes one of us loses control of our magic, you know, during. The spell contains that too so we'd probably have to have something like that up even if we lived alone in the woods or whatever."

Ruby stared at Emma's back, "You're seriously having like, awesome magic sex constantly, aren't you?"

"Kinda," Emma said, turning with a sheepish, but pleased blush. "And Regina can be very…inventive where magic is concerned."

"Wow," Ruby said, impressed and rather jealous.

"Ha!" Emma interrupted triumphantly, "Found it." She straightened up, brandishing the book and they headed out of the room. "Time to get back to our regularly scheduled magical mayhem."

"Hey," Ruby said as they were about to open the door, "I'm really happy for you, Emma." Ruby might tease Emma about being whipped (she would tease Regina too if she wasn't still the tinsiest bit scared of her) and want to know all the scandalous details, but even a blind person could see how happy Emma was these days. She was glad her friend had managed to make a family.

Emma got what she was trying to say and mirrored her smile, "Thanks, Rubes."

-/-

A/N: This one-shot was mainly borne out of my desire to write something short for once. Every idea i get ends up turning into something thats like 10 pages minimum and I really wanted to try and keep something short and sweet. I'm not totally sure I like how this turned out, but it's not meant to be super serious writing-just something fun. Maybe? I always love the soundproofing spells and of course the mortification of Snow and the glee of Ruby.

Anyways, speaking of not short things, I'll probably be posting another one-shot that ended up like 10 pages in a few days as I edited that as well while procrastinating on studying. 'Swan and Witch' will not be updated until Thanksgiving when I actually have time off to really work on it. (This was short and the other had been slowly built upon for a while which is why they were easy to polish up and finish off). Sorry for the delays, nothing is abandoned. Promise.

Thanks for reading and reviews make me smile!


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